The Many Faces of Ruth

Haahaa!! I get such a kick out of her! Her rash is starting to look better on her forehead, but her cheeks are still really bad and now its on her neck. Poor little thing.

Almost 4 weeks

Look at how chubby she is getting! At 3 1/2 weeks she weighed 8 pounds 8 ounces, which is TWO POUNDS more than when we took her home from the hospital!!! Crazy girl! She is also losing quite a bit of her hair, especially on top. She still gets the hiccups ALL the time and she is starting to smile lots and lots and we LOVE it! What a beautiful, beautiful baby girl.

cousins

The following picture is not her cousin, it is her Aunt Megan. Or her "grandma" as they said at the hospital when Megan kept saying her baby was having a baby!!!! (meaning, she took care of me ALL the time when I was a baby...she was fourteen) And I wanted to take this picture ESPECIALLY because she was my nurse anesthetist and she was AMAZING and she was there the WHOLE day of her 24-hour shift (which started just after we got there) and I was so, so, so HAPPY that I had her support, wisdom, and skills through my very first labor and delivery. THANK YOU!!!!!!!!! We love her.

Love

I am in love with our little baby Ruthie. In love. At first I was worried there was something wrong with me. When they handed her to me at the hospital my first thought was "I am much too exhausted to hold a baby. Why are they handing her to me? I can barely lift my arms up to keep her on my tummy, and I don't know what to do with her." Not really the greatest first thoughts of a mother. Thats not to say I wasn't excited, I was excited. And I thought it was amazing that she was mine. But I didn't think she was beautiful at first sight. I looked up into Sterling's eyes that held so much amazement and love and emotion in those first few moments and I thought "What's wrong with me?" And then I puked about seven times. Lovely.

In the hospital, when I started feeling better and had slept a little, I grew to feel amazed at what had happened. When we left the hospital I was starting to think our baby might just be the most beautiful thing that ever came down to earth.

Now I can't look at her without getting emotional about how big she is already, how chubby she's getting, how fast she's growing---and its too much for me. I keep thinking that at this rate she'll be going to Kindergarten (and college!) before I know it! Not only is she incredibly beautiful, but she opens her eyes, and her eyes are the most gorgeous thing---so awake and trusting, her lashes are absolutely perfect, her little lips are just the right shape and shade, her cheeks are incredibly soft and absolutely delicious, and when she smiles and her eyes turn up, I think I must just be the luckiest mom in the entire world to get such a beautiful daughter to be mine. She is just so perfect. When I wake up at night to feed her it hits me that I am in control of her little life right now. I am responsible for making sure she is fed and clean and happy. That thought brings a lot of emotions, and strongest of all is the thought that for this little baby, I would be willing to give up any other thing in my life. When she cries with real tears...my heart just melts and I can't wait to pick her up and make her happy again and wipe away those tears. And it is the most tender and amazing thing to watch the man that I love more than anything in the world, hold that little one that has suddenly taken over my whole heart, and see that she's taken up his whole heart too. They make a perfect picture. And the realization sweeps over me that if Satan tears up families, he really is tearing up the most precious and important thing that God has given to us. I can't believe the world hasn't caught on to that.

So while it might not be the most romantic thing to say that I didn't feel instantly won over by this little being that I birthed at the hospital, I can say now that it is incredible how she has wormed her way into my heart and grasped it with those tiny little fingers of hers and held on so tight I feel like I can hardly breathe sometimes. I feel so lucky, and so privileged to be a mother...HER mother. And even though lately I cry at every-day sentences because I'm so overtired from feeding her all night, and even though I know she will have hard stages, and I might just want to get rid of her when she's a teenager---I am so very thankful she is mine. I am so glad that right now I get to rock her, and sing to her, and kiss her perfect cheeks, and gaze at her beautiful face, and catch as many moments as I possibly can, because already the thought of her growing up makes me heart hurt a little.

And just for the record, while this may sound picturesque and sweet, being a new mom makes me pretty grouchy and snappy. Kudos to Sterling for putting up with me and loving me and making me so many dinners and doing so many dishes. Does school really have to start tomorrow? People have babies during school all the time, and even when both parents are in school....so it'll be all right, right?????

I have sleeping pictures to post too, but somehow they just aren't quite as fun. I've still got to master taking pictures of her, with her eyes open, without the coffee table background...haahaa. And I really need to get some professional pictures taken. All you sisters out there...what are the normal ages you take pictures of your kids(professionally) before you start going to once a year???


This last one is her "mouse face"...that's what I call it anyway. She makes it ALL THE TIME, and I, for one, find it absolutely adorable....and rather funny.

Sweet Pea

And here are those big eyes going, Mom?!! Why are you taking so many pictures of me???

Why New Moms Are Always Late

Okay...doctors appointment in two hours...probably should start getting ready.

Mom eats, because mom is always starving.

Baby eats, and takes 40 minutes because she can't decide if she wants to sleep more, or eat more.

Mom changes baby's diaper and puts her in clean clothes for the day.

Baby makes about five noises in her diaper.

Mom changes baby's diaper.

Baby pees while mom is changing diaper(I swear I waited and waited to make sure she was REALLY done).

Mom puts new outfit on baby.

Mom tries to hurry and make hair look respectable for the day.

Mom tries on fifty billion shirts that all look too tight and starts to get really discouraged about looking decent for the day. Luckily, all pants fit.

Baby is hungry again.

Mom feeds baby.

Baby eats for twenty minutes.

Baby decides to puke up all three ounces she just consumed.(odd too, this is the one and only time she's ever spit up in her two-week existence)

All over the shirt mom finally decided looked half-ways decent.

Mom not impressed.

Changes baby, changes self(really, this shirt thing is lamesauce).

Mom hungry again, but decides to grab granola bar for the road.

Baby hungry again, since all food consumed was puked up.

Feed baby.

Have to make sure diaper bag is full for any type of emergency.

Change baby's diaper again. Probably twice, just because baby likes

to mess clean diapers, not already dirty ones.

Have to put baby in car seat.

Want to put cute bow in baby's hair for doctor's appointment, but look at clock and realize already late.

How in the world did those two hours pass that fast??!?!?!?!??!?!

Somehow, I NEVER manage to get the bow on at the beginning of the day. Sigh.

My sister Kayli said I had not posted pictures recently enough, unfortunately I can't get the photo editing program to work on this computer that I normally use, so I'll just post

a quick one from our lazy Sunday yesterday(she fell asleep like this when I was trying to get her to be happy and I thought it was so hilarious! Look at those little arms!) And I promise, as soon as I figure out this program, I will post adorably cute pictures of her instead of just funny ones:

For Kayli

My sister, Kayli, lives in Switzerland. She is super amazing and sent us a package for little Ruthie! I know everything doesn't match, and I plan on trying to get some better pictures of all the awesome items we got, but for now, this is to show Kayli that we got her package and THANK YOU! (AndPS, I also got the hairband for my hair, and I wore it yesterday, but I didn't take a picture. When I went to try it out Sterling was watching and when I put it in he says "That actually looks pretty hott, I thought at first it looked really weird" haahaa). Then I've got to post all the pictures I took of my nieces and nephews holding her last night.

I Just Can't Help Myself

I suppose I don't have to apologize for so many baby pictures, since this is my blog, and it is my baby, and it's your own personal choice to look at the pictures. And who wouldn't want to look at such beautiful pictures all day long? Apparently though, not everyone LOVES the bug-eye pictures like I do, so I kept those to a minimum. Haahaa. Sterling and I will ooh and aah over her bug eyes on our own time.

PS I should be a whet nurse. Better yet, someone should pay me for my milk. Because, let me assure you, having SO MUCH extra milk has been the WORST part of recovery.

PPS I told Sterling today, while standing in the bathroom and looking in the mirror, that extra oily skin after having a baby bites. He said "The oil is what gives people a new-mom glow" and I said "My nose is not glowing" and he replied "It is....like Rudolph." Thank you, hon, I knew you'd be there to support me! It would be funnier if it wasn't so true.

PPPS I am in love with this first picture. SO in love. I need my sister Kayli to teach me photography. Better yet, I should read the instruction manual on our new camera, cause I think most of my issues are to do with the terrible lighting in our little apartment.

I know her head looks crinked, but I promise its supported and she is happily sleeping!

Tried

I promise I tried really, really hard to pick only ONE picture from today to post. It didn't happen. Really, I get SO excited when I get pictures with her beautiful eyes open, that I can't help but post more. And then I had to add the daddy/daughter cuteness. And I also HAD to add that cute picture of her bum. Thanks Megs for the adorable outfit--we've adored looking at her little bum all day long!

Home

Ruthie is home and healthy and happy. She did pretty good on sleeping last night, although I have to admit its kinda weird to think that I'll never just give her back to one of my sisters after a period of babysitting!!!! I know I birthed her, but its still a little surreal that she's mine! She is the perfect baby and is eating and sleeping in a pretty regular routine. I'm a little sore from getting milk in (another weird thought...I always held the baby, and gave them back to mom to nurse...now I'M the mother that can nurse??? REALLY?!?!?!! It seems really normal, but kinda bizarre at the same time) but so far so good, and hopefully it stays that way! She has a perfect baby smell, perfect baby noises, the cutest cry in the whole wide world, and so I suppose we'll keep her :)

Nap time...first with daddy, then with mom.

Look at all ten of my long, long fingers!
Look how long her fingers are! CRAZY!