PASS!

I PASSED CLINICAL BOARDS!!!!!
This was the board that mattered. This was the board that would have cost over $2000 to retake. This was the board I had to pass or I had decided I was switching majors rather than retaking. I really can't describe how happy I am. Sterling said I was like a giddy schoolgirl. Other tests are easily retaken, but this board really was the clincher. Oh sweet joy.


Lets hope I find out about my written boards soon.

Realization

I had a fantastic weekend, and then this morning I came to the realization that it is Monday. And I have about 8 projects that have to be done in the next two weeks. Thus, the dental hygiene program continues to sink its poisoned claws into the visade of my happy life. I have a six page paper, two 2-page papers, a group project, 10 more pages on my thesis, observing at two dental offices, a couple more eaglesoft patients, and about five PE's. Sigh. And on top of that I have to continue studying for anesthesia. Ugh.

Back to the happy weekend. Started off with Marlowe(Sterling's little bro) sleeping over at our house Friday night. He helped me make chocolate chip cookies. We had some issues with brown sugar...but they turned out pretty good!We had several nice discussions about STI's, DNA and RNA, mRNA, and I even pulled out an old BioMed book to answer some of our discussion questions. Those boys. I've taken several more biology/pathophysiology upper division classes than either of them (Marlowe still being in high school) and I remember so much less than them!

Then I worked on 8hr shift on Saturday while Sterling and Marlowe played. Then, when I got off work, Sterling and I drove to Provo, where we met up with several of our friends. It was so much fun to be with other young married couples! We went up Provo Canyon and had a fire, had tinfoil dinners, banana boats, and ate lots of skittles. We didn't really play any games, we just relaxed and enjoyed which felt SO GOOD. We started singing songs, and I convinced Sterling to sing--it was a Billy Joel song and he sang it so amazingly wonderful--I love that man's voice. Then we slept over at Aleesha and Adam's and in the morning went to my sister Kami's little baby's blessing. His name is Sebastian. I really haven't quite convinced myself that I have a nephew named Sebastian. Crazy people in this family. We had quite the time finding the church building, but can I just say---he is a really cute baby. Even Sterling thinks so.

Then we came back to Ogden and watched Mission Impossible 3 at my brother Wyatt's house. Lots of good food, and fun had by all. We started early, so it was a great way to end such a fabulous, wonderful, relaxing weekend. I think I've been uptight about dental hygiene for so long, its just incredible how wonderful it feels to just enjoy the moment and feel happy. This may be premature though, since I have no idea how I scored on my exams. Here's hoping.

Sick

I'm sick of school. I'm sick of studying. I'm sick of 3 papers looming ahead of me and 7 projects and 6 PE's and days of clinicals and CA's and requirements. I'm sick of taking tests. I'm sick of spending money on taking tests. I'm sick of putting on scrubs in the morning and thinking that I'll be stuck in the dental hygiene building all day long. I'm sick of being stressed. I'm sick of not being able to sleep. I'm sick of having an unkept house. I'm sick of not being able to do anything fun. I'm sick of not being able to see my husband for longer than an hour a day because we have opposite schedules. I'm sick of dental hygiene. I'm sick of trying to jump hoops that I don't really care to jump anymore. I should've been an english teacher. I would've been poor, but I could've written essays all day long with my students, and read books, and poems, and talked about alliteration and deeper meanings, and foreshadowing. It would've been fun. I would've enjoyed myself. It wouldn't have been practical---but I'm pretty through being practical at this moment. Seriously considering not getting my dental hygiene license and getting a masters degree in creative literature. I'll write children's books about boring old adults who have had all the fun and life sucked out of them from dental hygiene programs.

Yes...I took my last exam today. I have no idea how I feel about it. There were five options for every multiple choice question and I could always discard three, and I'd be down to debating between two options, and I guessed. On just about every answer. Well, maybe not that much....but still.

I'm sick of dental hygiene. I'm sick of stress and tiredness and stress and dental hygiene. And no, you shouldn't have read this if you didn't want to hear me whine. Its a joke. Its not even like we're that important of a profession, why should they put us through this? Hello! I just want to be a human that enjoyed my time on earth, thank you very much, and helped people, and listened to music, and reared children who understood how to enjoy life and be kind and eat chocolate and read books. Sigh. Sigh. And deep, long sigh.

3-23-10

I'm blogging about clinic again and it feels really good. It feels good to be in clinic and feeling like life is just normal...unfortunately my test looming ahead of me tomorrow is somewhat suffocating that contented feeling. I had a Class III patient scheduled this morning, that I needed to help with completing requirements, and she called thirty minutes beforehand and her ride hadn't showed up to bring her. So, Kara, being the sharp thinker that she is, gave me her patient (full mouth Class III) and she took an extra 1B pt that Julie had, and all of us were able to fulfill the requirements we needed. So happy.

This afternoon I had a recall Class IV that I saw last semester. Last semester she had a 12mm pocket, and beside it was a 9mm pocket. I put her on peridex and put Arestin in those two sites. The deepest pocket now...a 7. So happy! She also had a lot of calculus buildup from using the Peridex, and that was a lot of fun. But it was neat to see the improved condition of her mouth. More of a Class II now, rather than a III/IV...evolving to a V. If that makes any sense.

I had McKenna scramble with me to clean my unit for another patient...who cancelled. Sigh. I didn't need that patient, but I have a feeling he'll want to reschedule, which is kinda lame, cause I don't have the space in my schedule to schedule anybody else. I have two spots left, and two people who want them, but haven't confirmed yet.

Which means.....THE SEMESTER IS ALMOST OVER! I'M ALMOST FINISHED SCHOOL! ONE MORE BIG EXAM! I'm getting a bit ahead of myself, especially since I think I might not do so hot on the written exam. Oh well. I'm just nervous about clinical, and finding out whether I passed or not. Its the one that really matters. The $1100 question.

One more to go...

So I was scheduled to take two anesthesia exams on Thursday, a written and a clinical. The written has to be passed BEFORE you can take the clinical. I failed the written exam, which meant I did not get the chance to take the clinical. I was EXTREMELY blessed to be able to get on the computer right away, and try to find a testing center nearby to retake it, so I wouldn't have to fly to Washington, or New Mexico or something. There was one in Orem, but the deadline for application had passed. There were still spots available, so I called the testing agency, and the lady said if I put my application in by 1:30 I could sign up for the exam. So I did. And I now have an email confirmation. This will mean I take the exam the weekend after graduation in April. A setback yes, but since the results for this exam are instantaneous, and I won't have my license processed by then anyway, it really won't be a big deal. The $475 to retake it? Kind of a big deal. Upon receiving my exam failure paper I was....shocked, but not surprised. It was a REALLY hard exam, and I know the other girls, although relieved to have passed themselves, will definitely agree with me. A couple other girls didn't pass as well, which shouldn't make me feel any better...but it does. And it makes me grateful that I will have a study group as well. It was a hard exam. I keep telling myself that. It was more than a little rough though. I didn't cry at the school, but at soon as I told Sterling I started bawling. And then continued to have nervous breakdowns for the next day and a half. Sterling even called me at work the next afternoon and told me that if I needed to have any more "anesthesia breakdown" another girl had shown up at work, and he could come home if I needed him too. I love that man. I think its just because I am so used to being the top of everything scholastically, it shook me quite a bit. But I'm okay now, I have another date scheduled, and it really will be fine.

I took my clinical dental hygiene exam two days later, on Saturday. My patient (who I had called THREE TIMES the day before) showed up only minutes after I got there at 6:50 in the morning! Bless her heart! Prof. A who is absolutely AMAZING, came and did my anesthesia for me. I called her the day before, and telling her I failed my anesthesia exam was like telling my mother all over again. But she was so kind about it, and I am so thankful to her. Everything for my dental hygiene clinical went really smooth. My patient didn't qualify on her first submission, but she did on her second...which basically means that I had to do four extra teeth, and I got a four point reduction...but it really was okay. The anesthesia was fabulous(she's a pretty jumpy patient) and I felt like I had the time I needed, the paperwork went WAY EASIER than mockboards, and all in all, I really felt good about it. I find out if my feelings are justified in a couple weeks. Lets just hope, cause this was the REALLY expensive and difficult exam, cause I had to find a patient and everything.

Now I have one more exam to go...on Wednesday. I don't know who will be more relieved, me, or Sterling. He thinks the program is "sucking all the life and happiness out of me and leaving me a little, hollow, shell of a man". He calls me a man sometimes. Not sure what I think about that. Haahaa. He has been an absolute angel through all of this. I, on the other hand, have been WAY more emotional than usual-I surprise even myself, cause I am usually so emotionally STABLE. If waffles don't turn out, I cry. If I lose something, I cry. If he looks at me funny, I cry. Haahaa--actually I said that because I watched Wyatt's girls last night, and so he fed me dinner, and after dinner Lindsay Ann was bathing the girls and I could hear this wailing from the tub...and I asked Lindsay Ann what was wrong with Hailey and she said "Cassidy looked at her funny." Haahaa. So funny.

So I know this has been a long saga, and probably nobody really read all of it, but lets just say, having all of these tests in one week was the worst idea anyone ever had, I am sad I didn't pass anesthesia, but relieved to have another month to study, and I am SO HAPPY for all the warm, summer days that are coming up when I don't have to be in school and studying and taking tests. It'll happen someday. I can do it. I went to a marrieds fireside tonight (by myself, sterling was at work) and the speaker said "There's some things I just can't do anything about, and being ugly's one of them." But education is something I can do something about...and someday this semester will just seem like a little bump in the road(thanks Shaylee's mom for putting it into perspective). Now. To study. One more exam this week.

Studying, Studying

I thought I would get more and more frantic as the tests came closer and closer. Really, I'm just ready for it all to be over. Unfortunately, that attitude isn't very helpful in getting me into cram-study mode. It is Sterling's Spring Break, and as such, he is working 9-hour shifts every single day except Sunday and Thursday....because he is my anesthesia patient for my exam on Thursday. Which will only take about ten minutes. But I previously didn't know my time for the exam, and so I had him take the entire day off. It's probably going to be the most stressful day because there are two exams, and the clinical is predicated on the written.
Exams in my future go as follows:
Thursday-written anesthesia exam at 8:30am. IF I pass this exam (I have two chances...well, if I don't pass and pay another $120 I have two chances) and only then, I will take my clinical anesthesia exam at 2:35. Inbetween that time I have a clinic orientation. This is mostly for students from out-of-state who are coming in to take the exam, but we are required to be there.

Saturday-clinical dental hygiene exam. This exam starts at 7am, and I am pretty confident that once my patient is qualified....IF she qualifies....I'm easy sailing, because I have two and a half hours to clean what I can usually clean in 20-30 minutes. But it has to be perfect, or I don't pass. Not passing this exam would mean that I don't graduate and I don't get a license. This exam will be over by 11:30am.

Following Wednesday: written dental hygiene exam. This begins at 7:30 am and is an all-day experience. I don't even remember how many questions are on this exam, but it is comprehensive of everything I've learned since my prerequisite classes. Funnily enough, I'm not too worried about this exam. I should be. This is the material that has suffered because of my lack of focusing due to getting married. What is hopefully reassuring to me is that you only have to get a 75%, and usually twenty questions get thrown out. Now, twenty questions out of hundreds may not be many....but here's hoping.

So basically....I am FREAKED about Thursday. This may be the cause of my many emotional breakdowns. I don't remember what the first one was about. The second one was because I lost my temple recommend, the third one was because I felt bad that I was having so many emotional breakdowns, and then we went to Wyatt and Lindsay Ann's and watched Seasons of the Heart and I practically bawled through the entire thing yesterday. Sigh. Luckily, this morning has been super productive, I'm already half-way through what I had designated for myself today, which means I'll probably get further than anticipated, which is very happy.

Then, after next Wednesday, I have a couple papers, one exam for a class, and GRADUATION! In the meantime, I have a new calling, our membership records have arrived, I've already been asked to do a musical number (luckily I'm married to Sterling and I can con him in to helping me) and I'm supposed to be finishing up all my resume stuff so I can get a job!

Frazzled

Can I just say OH MY GOODNESS!!!!! Today was insane. I felt like a rushed crazyperson.
I had four patients scheduled in hopes of a Board patient. I didn't sleep all night last night because I was so worried that if one of them didn't work out, I WOULD NOT HAVE A PATIENT FOR MY FINAL LICENSING EXAM!!!! Poor Sterling, I kept him awake half the night too because I was so upset.

My first patient, hadn't been in to have her teeth cleaned in over 10 years. She was borderline class II, but they called her a 1B. Ouch. I did have fun with her lingual bars though, she had an upper and a lower, and HOLY CALCULUS! So at least that was good.

Then, Alyse, being the angel that she is, switched me patients, took my Class V and I did a full mouth xray on her patient, where one of his quads qualified for Board. So at least I had a foot in the door, but he was definitely not ideal, and I was sketchy about the whole idea.

My patient shows up in the afternoon...solid Class III, which I am DYING for...but too many carious lesions to qualify for boards. ARGH! So I rescheduled her, and brought her daughter into the chair. Can I just say PERFECT BOARD PATIENT! I felt like praying right then---I was SO grateful!!!

So I went off to take a full mouth of xrays on her. Only it was an adventure because there were no correct xrays kits, of the ones we werent issued and so WSU is supposed to provide, so I had to get creative and put tape on other kinds and things to get it to work. But...amazingly enough, no retakes! Unfortunately, it didn't catch her wisdom teeth, so we ended up taking a panoramic, which was fun because I TOTALLY didn't realize that WSU had scanx panoramic! YEEHAW!

Then I wanted to clean a quad of my Board patient, just so I knew what to expect. Yup, she'll need anesthesia, and so it was a good experience. I actually didn't clean the full quad, I only went to the canine. But it went well. I am pumped.

Then they called pod wrap. My unit hadn't been cleaned at all, I hadn't even put my instruments in the ultrasonic. And then they offered to help us sharpen instruments, which I totally wanted to do. So.....I ended up cleaning my unit at FIVE O'CLOCK AT NIGHT when everyone had left. Sigh.

Good points of today beyond the frazzlement:
-Two full mouths, I only need 3 more PA's
-Screened 8 quads of a class III plus Alyse gave me 2 quads, which REALLY helps, and means I only need five more quads
-FOUND A BOARD PATIENT
-did an eaglesoft on my 1B this A.M. now I just have to fill out the paperwork

So. All in all, it was probably the most productive clinic day of my life. Lets just not repeat it. I might not live. Thank everyone for Michelle, who gives me chocolate and water. I love her.

LA Mockboard

This morning was local anesthesia mockboard. This was a good experience because on the real day we have to take the written exam and pass it in order to move on to the clinical exam, and its all on the same day. So...Lindsay hasn't really started studying for the exam yet. I have studied two evenings and four modules...which means there were a lot of holes. But since, luckily, this particular mockboard does not go on our real grade, I was curious to see how I would do. I passed...but barely. Haahaa. But I guess a pass is a pass---lets just hope the studying between now and then makes it REALLY a pass! Then, we have to do two injections, PSA and IA, and I did them on a first year student. I did both injections just fine. But I failed because I touched the back of a card that holds the needle. Its really quite a stupid thing I think....and NOBODY is that careful with needles out in the real world, and my finger BARELY hooked around to the other side of the card, but nonetheless, chalk up another failed experience in my book. I'm just elated that my injections went so well and I was as calm as I was. It was a fabulous experience---and its not graded, did I mention that?

So now...on the big day, I need to just repeat everything, minus the finger touch, and I will be A-OK!!!!

The rest of my day, I had my horrendous patient from two weeks ago that was bleeding so bad before I even touched him, and he told me he hadn't brushed his teeth in years because it bled so much. Due to complications such as gagging, intense sensitivity even after several anesthesia injections, and intense debris throughout his mouth, Dr. Naylor ended up deciding that a gross scale was necessary, and we could do a fine scale later. Well, that 'later' was today.

My patient walks in, holding a floss pick. And he was proud. "I brush twice a day and I use my floss pick EVERY time I get in the car." And I asked him if he still bled when he flossed "Its a little pink when I spit." HALLELUJAH!!! His mouth seemed a hundred times less diseased! He was still very sensitive, I used Oraquix because the problem with anesthesia last time was that it wore off, and with Oraquix I can just reapplying to each tooth individually. It worked almost like a charm. Minus mesial of #8, 9...and a few other delicate spots. Haahaa. But honestly, it made hand scaling(he would have none of the ultrasonic) a class IV almost fun! And it made me VERY happy to see he was actually LISTENING to me! Now, he can proudly present himself to his dentist and get all the restorative work done that the dentist wouldn't do until his mouth was clean. I feel fulfilled.

Happier note, Sterling made sesame chicken for dinner last night, and we had leftovers for lunch today, and it was VERY good. Also, in three weeks I will be completely done with exams. The thought just makes me giddy with happiness. Lets just hope I pass them all! Also....well, not much else. I'm going to skip classes tonight to study. Good luck to me!